The train was about to pull into the station for a five-minute stop.
I needed some fresh air.
As soon as I stepped off the train, the biting cold hit me, and I instinctively wrapped my arms around myself.
A coat was draped over my shoulders.
It was Alexander who had followed me.
I pulled the coat tighter around myself, turning to meet his gaze. Even though I had removed the illusion of admiration, I couldn't deny that his looks were exceptional.
He naturally voiced his concern, "Why didn't you put on a coat before stepping off? It's cold out here. Don't catch a cold."
Though his words were full of concern, I could clearly see the indifference in his eyes.
He didn't even bother to hide it—or maybe he never had.
This, I realized, was his version of "taking care" of me.
How foolish had I been to deceive myself for so long?
It was time to wake up.
A bitter smile escaped my lips. "Alexander, you really never liked me, did you?"
Perhaps my expression was too fragile, and for a moment, I saw a flicker of struggle in his eyes.
After a few seconds of silence, he replied, "I did like you."
"Seraphina, we've known each other too well. Being with you every day, there's no sense of novelty. Holding your hand feels like holding my own left hand."
"We're more like family. The thought of marrying you, of being with you in that way, feels like incest. I have no interest in it."
"Haha, incest?" I laughed, tears streaming down my face.
The hot tears froze to ice the moment they left my eyes.
"I didn't understand back then."
I blurted out, "Can Eleanor give you that novelty? Or is it because she looks a little like Lucia?"
Alexander's face shifted, and he gripped my shoulder tightly. "Seraphina, you have no right to mention her."
The pain in my shoulder was sharp and sudden, and I gasped in agony.
Through clenched teeth, I replied, "Alexander, I never told anyone about Lucia."
His eyes reddened. "It's been so long, and you're still defending yourself. You're the only one who knows about her."
I broke free of his grip. "Believe what you want."
It didn't matter anymore.
The train conductor started urging the smokers to hurry, the train was about to depart.
As Alexander turned to board the train, I called out to him.
"We should call off our engagement."
He spun around quickly, his voice urgent. "Are you serious?"
"Yes."
"But I have one condition."
His expression shifted to one of impatience, a look that said "Here we go again." "Go ahead."
I stared out at the distant snow-capped mountains, exhaling a heavy sigh. "I've done a lot of planning for this trip. Let's call it our breakup trip."
"Before the engagement is officially called off, I want the 18-year-old Alexander to come back to me for a while. Can you make that happen?"
His lips tightened, a few strands of hair falling over his forehead, accentuating his deep-set features.
He was silent, his piercing gaze fixed on me, eyes unreadable, as if trying to see through me.
From the corner of my eye, I saw a flash of pure white in the doorway, a smile blooming like a flower.
"Now, could you let him hug me?"
For a moment, he looked taken aback, then, without another word, he pulled me into his arms.
"Seraphina, even if I don't marry you, I will still take care of you for the rest of your life."
---
In his embrace, I felt coldly indifferent.
He was right. The familiarity between us was so profound that no matter how tightly he held me, my heart didn't race.
In fact, it was almost... repulsive.
His so-called care?
I had no interest in it.
I just didn't want him to ruin the trip I had meticulously planned.
This was my farewell gift to myself for the first twenty years of my life.
It had nothing to do with him.
