When everything settled down, I went to that pizza by myself, tears mixed in with every bite.
The next day after school, I saw him at the entrance of my new school.
He turned into an alley, and I followed him inside.
He gave me a piggy bank and said, "This is a happiness bank. Whenever something good happens, put some money in it, okay?"
I told him I didn't have any happy things to put in it.
He said, "There will be!"
His words seemed magical, and I encountered many good things at my new school.
For instance, Talisa; we became good friends.
And Miss Woods, she told me seriously that no matter what happened, I should tell her right away. The other students were all very kind.
I happily shared these experiences with him, and he listened quietly.
But most of my happiness came from him.
He disciplined those who bullied me, making them avoid me when they saw me.
He would give me apples, big and red.
If I forgot my umbrella, he'd slip one into the side pocket of my backpack.
He would follow behind me when I was coming home late, staying far away, but his shadow would be close.
Slowly, the piggy bank filled up with more and more coins.
We maintained this not-too-close, not-too-distant relationship.
Later, when I started developing feelings, I fell for him.
But then he suddenly disappeared.
He was nowhere to be found, not in the alley, not in the pizza restaurant.
It was only then that I realized I didn't really know him, not even his real name.
That moment frightened me.
I feared I would never see him again.
Thankfully, that wasn't the case.
He reappeared on the evening of October 29th.
He stood downstairs smoking, silently.
If I hadn't opened the window on a whim, I wouldn't have noticed him.
The figure under the streetlight wasn't clear, but I knew it was him immediately.
I carefully opened the door and rushed downstairs.
Seeing me surprised him.
Then he smiled and said, "Now that you're here, don't go."
He stubbed out his cigarette and had me sit beside him.
I asked him where he had been.
He said, "You're just a kid. Focus on your studies. Why do you need to know?"
I asked if he would disappear again suddenly.
He said, "What do you mean 'disappear'? I had something to take care of."
Hearing this, I finally felt reassured.
I asked him for his phone number.
He laughed and said, "Do you even have a phone?"
I didn't, but I insisted on having his number.
He clicked his tongue and said, "How will you remember without a pen?"
I said, "I can remember."
And I did remember.
I remembered that number for years until I suddenly forgot it.
That night, he insisted that I stay with him until midnight.
When it passed midnight, he patted my head and said, "Go back to sleep!"
I looked blankly at him.
Only years later did I realize that after midnight, it was October 30th—his birthday.
My story with Dick is dull and uninteresting.
We never appeared together in public, even when walking on the street, we kept a distance of an arm's length.
Whenever I tried to get closer, he would raise his eyes and glare me back into place.
But every time I had pizzas, there would always be an extra fried chicken in my bowl.
I was content with our arrangement, even though nobody around me knew about him.
I confessed my feelings to him when I was seventeen.
I said, "I love you. Can you be my boyfriend?"
He spat out a mouthful of water and started coughing.
He said, "I don't date minors."
I said, "I'll grow up."
He said, "Let's talk about it when you're an adult."
Later, I became an adult.
My grades were good enough to get into a great university.
But I didn't want to go; I didn't want to leave this city, the city where he was.
He asked me, "Which university are you planning to apply to?"
I told him the local university, my head down.
He sighed. "Is that so? What a pity. I was planning to develop my career in City A, but too bad someone can't come."
At those words, my heart raced.
I asked him, "Really?"
He said, "Of course! Go with me?"
I nodded, nodding vigorously.
Later, he said he needed to disappear for a while to wrap up some matters here and told me not to look for him or contact him.
I agreed.
All these years, I still didn't know much about Dick.
I only knew that he had no family, didn't attend school, and worked outside, doing jobs that weren't exactly good.
I asked him once, "Can't you stop doing this?"
He only shook his head, offering no explanation.
And now, with his sudden decision to tie up loose ends here, I was scared.
There was nothing I could do but wait.
It was the seventeenth day of waiting for him, and I fell asleep in his rented apartment.
Suddenly, voices and the sound of a key in the lock came from outside the door.
I woke up abruptly and rolled under the bed to hide.
Someone said, "Bro, rest well. It'll pass. We've all been through this."
Then came a low, angry growl: "Get out."
It was Dick.
After the voices faded and the room became quiet again, I crawled out from under the bed.
Dick was leaning on the sofa, panting heavily. He seemed dazed, and even as I approached him, his gaze was unfocused.
"Dick, what's wrong with you?"
He looked at me, and it took him a long while for his gaze to focus.
"Anne?"
I nodded.
I pulled him. "Let's go see a doctor, okay? What's happening to you?"
But he suddenly pulled me onto the couch, pinning me down.
That night became the longest night of my life.
I resisted, but couldn't push him away.
Eventually, I acquiesced.
There was nothing I could do; this was Dick.
Even though he had lost his mind and was hurting me.
When I woke up the next day, Dick looked at me with complicated eyes.
His hand rubbed against my neck.
He said, "Anne, I'm going to prison. I wanted to let you go, but you came back to me."
"In that case, you have to wait for me. As long as I don't die, you'll have to wait for me for ten or eight years. You can't be with anyone else, you can't go with anyone else. Otherwise, when I get out, I'll kill you."
Dick left hurriedly, without waiting for my response.
He left me a bank card, the password being my birthday.
I watched his back, dumbfounded, as he closed the door and left.
I didn't know that was the last time I would see him.
If I had known, I would have held him back and told him, "I won't wait for you. Don't go. Don't do anything. Just stay alive, please."
