When I woke up, the first thing I saw was a white ceiling.
I gradually became aware of the smell of disinfectant lingering in my nostrils.
"Wake up?"
The nurse glanced at me and skillfully replaced my IV bag.
"Do you remember you were in a car accident?
"But there's nothing serious. Your husband and your brother both protected you. You have some minor abrasions. Later, check if you feel nauseous or dizzy, to see if you might have a concussion."
I was startled. "Neil?"
"The young boy in the tracksuit!"
"Oh, your brother was injured quite seriously," the nurse said as she took my temperature. "He used his upper body to shield your head. Two of his fingers are broken, and he hit his head, but it's not a major problem. He doesn't play the piano, does he?"
I shook my head gently, biting my lower lip.
"And the other one?"
I remembered that before the accident, Elliot threw himself over me to protect me.
My thoughts were complicated. I didn't understand why Elliot did that.
It was he who didn't care about me.
It was also he who hurt me.
And yet, it was still him who risked his life to protect me.
Why did he do that?
The nurse paused for a second before comforting me.
"He was injured quite severely. If he had stayed quietly in the backseat, there wouldn't have been a problem, but he insisted on coming over to protect you. Two of his ribs are broken, and one was 0.8 centimeters away from piercing his heart."
"He's still in the ICU. Don't worry too much. He's been stabilized."
I lowered my eyelids.
I didn't understand why Elliot did that.
I feel like I never really understood this person.
……
Elliot woke up three days later.
Fortunately, his physical condition had always been good, and after a few more days, he was transferred to a regular ward.
Neil didn't follow me in.
At the door, he told me:
"I won't come in. You two probably have a lot to talk about."
I nodded and opened the door.
In just a few short days, Elliot seemed like a different person.
These days, he had been sustained by glucose and nutritional fluids. He had lost a lot of weight, and with his stubble and hospital gown, he looked rather gaunt.
I sat down beside him, and neither of us spoke.
After a few minutes, I broke the silence.
"Why did you save me?"
Lauryn had targeted me. The police said she had been stalking me for three days, intending to commit murder.
If Elliot hadn't protected me, I likely would have been badly injured.
And he, sitting in the backseat, should have been fine.
Elliot smiled.
"There's no need for so many whys. My mind didn't even have time to react."
The atmosphere fell silent again.
After a while, he looked out the window.
"Perhaps you are more important to me than I thought.
"Nicole, over the years, I always felt like I didn't love you anymore. There are so many fresh young girls out there, and I can't handle them all. They all admire me and try to please me.
"But unlike you, you never idolized me, because you saw me at my lowest.
"Whenever I saw you, I would think about the times when I was poor.
"Who likes to think about their miserable days? So, I didn't even want to see you.
"I thought I didn't love you."
He frowned, seeming a bit lost.
"But it's strange. When that car hit us, all I could think about was not letting anything happen to you.
"I don't understand it myself."
I don't understand either.
Maybe the human heart is just that complicated, making even ourselves unable to understand it.
I fiddled with my fingers, unsure of what to say.
Elliot managed a smile, but it was painful to look at.
"I thought you would always love me."
"When I found someone else, you were so upset. I thought you would always stay with me.
"During the accident, you protected Neil, didn't you?
"Nicole, you're such a fool. You can't help but give everything to the person you like. You're at a disadvantage, you know."
I bowed my head.
I once thought that Elliot didn't love me anymore, but during the accident, he chose to risk his life to protect me.
And I once thought I would always love Elliot, but at that moment, I chose someone else.
It's quite ironic.
"Nicole."
Elliot called me.
I looked up.
"Yes?"
He gave me a smile that was uglier than a cry.
"Let's get a divorce.
"I'm letting you go. Get out."
But I hesitated. "Your injuries aren't healed yet. Let's wait."
Elliot smiled. "What are you thinking, Nicole? Do you think I can't live without you?
"I, Elliot, am young and rich, handsome and debonair, a real eligible bachelor. There are countless girls lining up to win me over!
"I won't hang myself on a woman as fickle as you. Let's hurry up and get divorced, so I can find a younger and prettier girl."
This man, still unwilling to admit defeat even now.
I gave a bitter laugh and stood up.
"Okay."
Right before leaving the ward, Elliot called out to me.
"Nicole!"
I turned around. His eyes were slightly red, though I wasn't sure if it was just my imagination.
Elliot seemed to be crying.
"What's wrong?"
He looked at me for a long time, then said sarcastically:
"Nothing. Just get lost with your lover. Don't let me see you again, you're an eyesore."
His voice was trembling uncontrollably, unable to hold steady.
The setting sun shone through the yellowed window, casting light on him, with half of Elliot's face hidden in shadow.
He was like a lost traveler abandoned by someone, hoping that person would turn back, but unwilling to say it aloud.
I suddenly remembered how we met.
It was also such a sunset, and he turned around, his eyes and eyebrows filled with smiles.
"Hey, can you lend me a pen?"
It's been over a decade since then.
We've walked through the years, both of us worn down by the sands of time until we're unrecognizable.
I had nothing to say.
I could only leave with one last phrase:
"Okay."
