Zane rushed inside the hospital, his heartbeat increasing with every passing second. He went to the receptionist and tried asking the man with his gibberish words.
"Wait, let me speak to him," Winter volunteered as she appeared from behind Zane. She caught her breath and said, "An accident patient named Kalen Astor was brought here. Where is she right now?"
"In the emergency room three. It's at the end of the right hallway," answered the receptionist.
Zane dashed towards that direction with Winter following closely behind him. The lights of the surgery room were on, so there might be some hope left, although the person on the phone said his mom wouldn't make it.
"She's going to be fine, right?" he asked Winter, and she nodded, not knowing what else to say. In her heart, she knew that only bad news would come for them. After all, it was a hit-and-run truck accident.
After a few minutes, a nurse and a doctor came out of the surgery room.
"How's Mom, Doctor?" Zane inquired desperately.
The doctor lowered his gaze and shook his head slowly and said, "I'm sorry but she was actually dead from the accident when she arrived at the ER, but we tried to revive her without success."
Zane went numb for a few seconds with tears flowing down his cheek endlessly. Then he chuckled humorlessly, an insane look on his face due to denial. "The heck do you mean, doctor!" he shouted, grabbing the collar of the doctor.
Winter pulled him away from the doctor as he kept yelling at him. "Zane, stop," she begged him, tears sprinkling out of her eyes. "She is gone."
"No, no, she's not gone." He shook his head vigorously. "She has to get treated for her cancer. It's her operation in three months, Winter. I saved money for that. She can't leave me like this. She needs to come back," he said in a mad daze.
Winter just hugged him, holding him in his place so that he wouldn't go and try to beat the doctors again. She patted his back and mumbled, "Your mom is in a better place right now, and she wouldn't want you to act like this."
Zane closed his eyes and hugged her tightly, crying and sobbing loudly. He still couldn't believe that his mom, the one that he loved the most, was gone now. He had no one to call 'Mom' anymore. He had no one to listen to his outlandish talks which he felt shy saying to others. He lost the lap that let him cry whenever everything got too much or when he did badly on an exam. He would never get to feel the warmth of his mom's love.
After a few minutes, Ellie arrived, already a crying mess. The two siblings hugged each other and cried together now that they lost their most precious possession.
How unexpected life was—they were trying so hard to cure their mother's cancer, yet an accident took her life away. They were fine with always getting the short end of the stick, yet why did fate do such a cruel thing to them?
°°°°°
"Why won't you cry?" Winter mumbled quietly as she watched Zane from afar.
Today was the funeral ceremony of Kalen. It was raining heavily as if the weather was mourning as well. Cries and sobs filled the church, yet Zane didn't shed a tear that day, which was even more upsetting.
Winter had been standing in the corner, observing the ceremony, how Zane and Ellie greeted everyone that came to attend. Their father couldn't come on such short notice as he didn't get the flight tickets.
Zane caught Winter staring in his way. He gave her a small assuring smile as though he was telling her not to worry about him, that he was okay. Winter returned his smile and gestured that she would be here till the end; she wouldn't leave him.
Finally, it was time for the burial ceremony, the most heart-wrenching part. It reminded Winter of her mother's funeral. Her guts twisted in knots, remembering the painful memories. The body was carried out of the church to the back graveyard in the heavy rain.
Winter stood with an umbrella alongside everyone else, silently watching her boyfriend's face wreath in grief. Unknowingly, tears started rushing down her cheeks as she imagined how much pain Zane must be going through. He must be wanting to cry as well, but everything must be too overwhelming for him.
On the other hand, Zane's heart felt so heavy, the rain drenching him was one of the last things that could bother him. It was as if he had lost all the purpose of his life. His mother was the one that meant the most to him. Now that she was gone, what was he supposed to do? How was he supposed to live without her?
Before he knew it, his mother's coffin was buried already. The priest said some words of advice to him, which went unheard by him. Everyone started leaving one by one.
"Zane, I'm taking Ellie with me," informed Eris, his sister's boyfriend.
Zane only nodded his head as he heard Ellie protesting while crying as she was being dragged away by Eris. Zane kneeled in front of his mom's grave and just stared at the nameplate with a blank look.
"Why did this have to happen? Why did you have to die like this?" he questioned in an almost audible voice. He gulped and slammed his fist on the ground, knowing he wouldn't get answers— he would never get to hear his mother's voice again.
Suddenly the rain hitting his body stopped. As he looked up, he noticed a black umbrella being held by a slender hand that he was all too familiar with.
"Winter, you don't—" he tried to speak but was interrupted by her.
"You can stay as long as you want. Just let me be with you," she said, standing beside him.
Zane wanted to oppose but his dried voice said otherwise. He didn't have the strength to speak up. He felt too drained. He decided to stay quiet, letting all the painful thoughts consume him.
He lost track of time as he sat there on his knees in front of his mother's grave, talking to her.
It was dark by the time the rain stopped. When Zane finally gained consciousness, he noticed that Winter was still standing beside him, without having moved an inch.
"You're still here?" he asked, standing up on his wobbly feet.
Winter smiled warmly and said, "I told you that I will be with you."
He sucked in a breath and told her, "I'm so sorry that you have to see me like this."
Winter shook her head and took a step closer to him, giving a light squeeze to his hand. "Wanna make a last prayer in the church before we leave?" she offered.
Zane pursed his lips and nodded slowly, following her to the inside of the church. Once they reached inside, they both lit up two white candles and folded their hands, making a prayer for the dead.
The two of them sat down on the front pew, letting the silence in the big church occupy their thoughts. He cried his lungs out at the hospital, yet something about him not crying today was bothering her to the bones. Maybe he did cry when he was alone, but she needed to make sure he wasn't bottling everything up.
"You don't have to act that strong, you know?" Winter started.
Zane looked up at her with an expressionless face. "Dad said I can't fall weak right now."
"So what? You're going to just mourn silently?" Winter scoffed. "I never thought I would say this to you, but—" she paused and inhaled a deep breath. "I want you to cry, Zane. Please."
"Should I?" His voice was so brittle, it made her heart ache.
As soon as she nodded her head, he wrapped his arms around her hips, his head falling into her lap. She was momentarily startled but bent over instinctively to shield his body from anyone who would walk in because he didn't want to be seen like this.
She placed a soft kiss on his temple and pressed her cheek on his forehead.
And then he broke.
Shaking vigorously, he shattered in her arms, gasping a million times. He was like choking pieces that she was trying so hard to hold together.
Winter promised to herself, at that moment, that she would hold him forever, just like this, until all the pain and sufferings of his were gone, until he was back to normal; she would be his supporting pillar just like he had been for her.
Another thing that she realized through this crisis was that—she loved no one more than this crying man in her arms. She loved him so very much. In fact, she has been in love with him for a long time. But now that he was hurting, she could feel his pain very vividly, his tears pricked her like a needle. There was no proof bigger than that.
Winter kept no count for how long Zane just held her and cried like a baby, which she had been wanting, but it still hurt like hell to see the tears flowing endlessly through his eyes.
The man she loved was now broken just like the way she was nine and a half months ago.
